Society today places so much emphasis on scientific data as the only reliable source to any subject. Truth be told, when it comes to human sexuality, science speaks for itself. Dr. Joe Malone, Sexual Integrity Scientist, helps us understand why on Valentine’s (and every other) day!
TRUE LOVE AND MARRIAGE
Some in our 21st century Western culture are advocating many new relationship types. These include hookups, friends with benefits, throuples, cohabitation, polyamory, and more. They say that we need to be liberated from our sexually repressed lifestyles. The philosophy is that if it feels good, we should do it with as many different people as we choose. When it stops feeling good or gets old, we can switch to another or others. Being personally happy is the ultimate goal in life for each individual and the most important gifts are the ones we give to ourselves in the pursuit of pleasure, no matter how it affects the other people in our lives. Many of those we serve in the pregnancy help community have adopted this thinking. But we have a unique opportunity to share a vision of marriage, true love, and real sex with them. Consider this.
A CHRISTIAN DISTINCTIVE
An outstanding hallmark of Christianity from the beginning has been monogamous marriage. Christians stood out within their communities because of it. Contrastingly to the above thinking and practice, think of Valentine’s Day and the giving and receiving of a gift with the one we love. We may not realize all the value of the gift, when the gift is sex in a loving monogamous relationship that we can share with the love of our life, our spouse. There are so many benefits to sex within monogamous marriage. Let’s take a look at some of them.
BENEFITS ON MANY LEVELS
Sex within marriage leads to greater and greater levels of intimacy. You get to know each other better and better in a way that no one else on earth does. This helps develop a trust relationship that is sure and steady. In happy marriages this can have interesting physical benefits. Happily married couples blood pressures drop when they sleep together. Their heartbeats synchronize as well. Sex is a great releaser of stress!
Sex within marriage also doesn’t carry all of the negative baggage that sex previous to, or otherwise outside of marriage carries like guilty feelings, regret, worry about STIs or an unwanted pregnancy with someone who is not your spouse.
The physical contact involved in sex helps us to bond more strongly all of the time. There are endorphin receptors throughout the skin covering of the body and they react to intimate and loving touch, which generates endogenous (or internal) endorphins, a kind of super relaxant. Hugs contribute to this, and married couples are encouraged to hug each other at least eight times per day. Their hearts literally beat as one because of the assurance that they have that their spouse loves them absolutely and has their back at all times.
LIFE LENGTHENING AND ENHANCING
Another great benefit of married sex is that it is antiaging! Cells in the body that are anti-inflammatory are released during sexual activity. This helps the body to be able to repair more effectively and seems to be a built-in way that the wellness and well-being of the married couple is enhanced.
Sex within marriage raises our immune system by causing the release of an antibody called immunoglobin A. This helps protect our bodies against invasive bacteria and viruses. A lifelong marriage is a very holistic stabilizing factor physiologically for a couple.
SLEEP
An awesome married sex life helps us to sleep better because oxytocin is released substantially after sex. Cuddling afterwards and going to sleep is very natural and healthy. It helps us to have healthier looking skin as it promotes blood circulation, and it even helps women to have lighter periods. Sex within marriage raises our moods and gives us a more positive outlook on our spouse as we bond.
GOD’S WAY IS ALWAYS THE BEST WAY
If we are reflective, we see that its benefits go far beyond immediate pleasure and even increased physical and mental health. When we look at the physical fruits of married sexual relationships - children - it is obvious that this is definitely one of God’s most important gifts to us. After all, his first words to humanity were to go forth and multiply.
Married sex is a wonderful example of men and women displaying consistency, intentionality, and most of all faithfulness. This is what God intended for humans and without a doubt, it is best for us.
Marriage pays dividends multi-generationally to a family and then to all of the lives that a family influences in their lifetime. As we have seen before, it is always in our best interests to do things God’s way. Profound and magnificent blessings follow in that pathway. One path leads to death, the other path leads to life. Let’s help them choose life! Let’s give our clients a gift that keeps on giving, as we share the vision (and science!) of marriage, empowering them to experience one wonderful and memorable Valentine’s Day after another, year after year, and decade after decade.
